A SHORT (AND NOT ESPECIALLY ACCURATE) HISTORY

For as long as humanity has been venturing out of the house/castle/mud hut to explore the world, there have been people getting left behind during the trip.

Probably the most famous of these was Scotsman Alexander Selkirk, who spent four years during the 1710’s marooned on a desert island off the coast of Chile. He’s remembered because his experiences partly inspired the novel Robinson Crusoe.

He certainly wasn’t the first, though. There were probably Viking marauders stranded on the coast of Greenland, looking at the glaciers and penguins and thinking something along the lines of “Screw this! I can get this s**t at home!” (though in Norse, of course).
Similarly, there would have been Polynesian boatmen berating each other for rowing to “just one more island” and finding it exactly the same as the one they left behind.
Also, it has to be remembered, exploration by boat was much more risky in olden times, as the world was flat until 1400, hence the extra hazard of falling off the edge of it…

Robinson Crusoe – Propaganda for the South Pacific tourist board       (source)

However, it wasn’t until Daniel Defoe (taking time off from dodging creditors) decided to elaborate Selkirk’s story into one of the first novels in English, that being stuck in the middle of nowhere was seen as being anything other than a colossal pain in the arse. For better or worse, Robinson Crusoe gave enforced exotic solitude a romantic sheen. And it’s an image that has stuck.
In the UK, there is even a long-running radio show called Desert Island Discs which re-enforces a cosy, getting-away-from-it all aspiration that has graced a thousand package holiday adverts.

Unfortunately, as those that have attempted it by choice (most famously by Gerald Kingsland and Lucy Irvine in 1981) have found out, the realities of a castaway lifestyle are unremittingly grim.
However, being stranded in tropical climes at least allows for some chance of survival. A luxury not available to those that have been washed up on more polar shores. There have probably been castaways who found themselves on the coast of Antarctica. They haven’t been remembered because their life expectancy could be counted in hours.
To find those that did live to tell the tale, we have to move onto a far more dedicated brand of nutcase: the professional explorer.

Petrarch – Inventor of pointless leisure-time activities       (source)

Exploration for trade routes, natural resources or simply getting one over on your neighbours (i.e. the French) is, as already mentioned, as old as humanity. However, the urge to go somewhere with the challenge as the only reward is a relatively modern one.

Blame could be placed at the feet of the Italian poet Petrarch who, one day in 1336, decided to climb Mont Ventoux in southern France with no greater motivation than to “look at the view”.
Since then, those who have risked life and limb climbing mountains, trekking deserts and hacking through jungles merely for fame and reputation have been an ever-growing band. Indeed, by the C18th, you really couldn’t be considered a proper gentleman until you had at least sailed up some remote tropical river and contracted an interesting disease (Note: this bit of research is based solely on Jules Verne’s Around the World in 80 Days).

However, the list of places that need to be discovered and natural obstacles to overcome was shrinking by the day. Which left only the more extreme options. And the most extreme of all was reaching the North or South Pole.

The Scott Expedition – Second Place is First-Last.       (source)

The history of most Polar exploration can be quickly summarized: expedition leaves – expedition fails to reach pole – everybody dies.
However, this grim reality did nothing to put off the many who tried, especially during the golden age of the 1890’s/1910’s. Finally, the North Pole was reached (though he may have made it up) by American Frederick Cook in 1909 (and he lived to tell the tale).
The South Pole has to wait until 1911 and the famous Scott/Admundsen race. How gutting it must have been for Scott to actually get to his target, only to discover he was the second man ever to reach the pole. On the return leg, his expedition then reverted to type and everybody died.

Today, even though there are many permanent research stations based there, Antarctica still exerts a fascination for being the remotest and most inhospitable place on earth.
And a great place for horror stories, as the works of H.P. Lovecraft and both versions of The Thing will attest to.

Lost – Not real. Sorry.       (source)

Nowdays, despite what the TV series Lost would have you believe, it is almost impossible to get stranded geographically (and certainly not with a group who all boast Hollywood looks).

Adventure tourism is probably the closest any of us will come, unless you happen to have a career like freighter captain on the Gulf of Arabia (Somalia – ‘Come for the piracy, stay for the kidnapping!’).

Though, that said, it is remarkably easy to get lost in the modern world. Merely live in a big city and experience the full thrill of urban alienation.
How very existential…

Now proceed directly to the silly, one-panel cartoons. Thank you.